I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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