please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
