i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
