You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize