we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
