My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Randomize
