Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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