i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
