Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Randomize
