I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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