When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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