well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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