I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize