I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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