we have officially lost it.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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