never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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