I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
