you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
