she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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