I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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