I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
