I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize