Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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