Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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