i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
