the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
