there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
