Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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