One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
