I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
