i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
