she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
organizing the empties. That sober.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
