your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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