Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
