I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize