Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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