whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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