Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
