Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
