I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I need moral support for this bender
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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