People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize