just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
