Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
She's just so happy...and so naked.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Sorry about my life...
i believe in u and ur pee
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize