therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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