so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
