She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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