How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My vagina is officially offended.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
