Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
