by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
