ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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