i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
