Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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